An Open Letter To A Young Friend . . . (gender: confusion and clarity)

By Bill Randles
Used with permission

Dear X,

I offer you the warmest greetings in the name of Jesus.

I am writing out of a concern for you and a lot of others of your generation. You were born into a world which was already well into a “sexual revolution,” and this has presented you with perplexing questions and issues which my generation (Baby Boomers) didn’t have to bear as much as yours.

I come as a friend, and concerned Christian, in Jesus name. I want you to understand that I know why there is such a gap between my generation and yours.

I didn’t grow up in a world where gender was considered a fluid construct, or one in which my own sexual identity was constantly emphasized, or challenged, from Kindergarten through twelfth grade. To put that upon little children is such a great sin that Jesus warned that those who do so will not escape God’s wrath.

“Sexual Education” was just getting off the ground; we weren’t inundated with such heavy and confusing issues at a young age as you were.

For most of us, gender roles were still set in place like pillars—men were men, women were women, and that was that. No one ever thought to call that into question.

But part of the cultural revolution that you were born into was the destruction of all the former certainties. Sexual anarchists have destroyed notions such as “men are men and women are women,” in the name of freedom. They have pushed away all boundaries in the name of liberty; we have sexual liberation, women’s liberation, gay liberation, LGBT liberation, and now we have transgender liberation.

A famous American Poet once warned us not to “tear down a fence unless you realize what that fence was put there for in the first place.”.

I have noted that your generation is much more tolerant and accepting of any variation of sexuality for you have been taught not to judge anyone.  So many think in terms of “Whatever makes you happy!,” or “Live and let live!,” or “I am cool with that as long as you don’t hurt anybody.”

But I want to raise the question, “What were those old Judeo/Christian moral fences, which we tore down, put there for?”

You ask, “Why is it wrong for a girl to kiss another girl?” (I assume romantically). What could be wrong with two people loving each other?  What makes anything wrong in the first place? What determines “good or evil”? Are we able to determine for ourselves what good and evil is? Or is there a fixed standard?

The truth is, dear X, there is really nothing “gay” about being gay because it goes against the way we were created by God. There can be no real home, future, children, lasting legacy, or security in two boys or two girls kissing romantically; only rebellion, lust, and bitter disappointment, as many, many millions have found, according to statistics of suicide and drug abuse among “gays.”

Sexuality is part of the image of God. “Male and female created he them; and blessed them.” This is why sexual questions are extremely important, and sexual confusion is a serious danger. God Himself has assigned the sexual roles; they are not optional, nor are they mere “societal constructs.”

The Bible says that the truest meaning of marriage and sexuality is as a picture: of Christ and His church. Every man and woman at an altar stands as a symbol of something greater and more ancient, for marriage points to the redeeming love of Jesus for His church (whosoever believes on Him), which he purchased with His own blood.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;  That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,  That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:  For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.  For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.  This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:25-32)

A man’s role in marriage is to imitate Christ, in selfless devotion to his wife and family, laying down his life in countless services, protections, and provision. The wife is to uphold her husband, loving, and respecting him. Together they build a safe nurturing place to rear children.This is the scriptural vision of marriage.

Of course, no one has done it perfectly since the fall, but this is God’s plan for human stability and happiness.

This is what makes adultery, incest, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, and any other distortion of sexuality such a serious issue. How serious? So serious that those who continue in these things will not be able to enter the Kingdom of God for it is an act of rebellion against God.

It all comes down to whether or not you are going to believe that God’s way will make you happy, or man’s way. This was the choice Adam and Eve were presented with, and they chose Satan’s lie, that doing their own thing would make them happier, wiser, and better people. Homosexuality and gender distortion is a modern form of that same lie.

I am praying for you, dear X, that you will come through this time of testing in agreement with your Creator, and that you will find true happiness in marriage, motherhood, and all of life as a Christian.

Your concerned Friend,
Pastor Bill

And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,  And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:4-6)

You may read more by Bill Randles on his blog.

(photo from bigstockphoto.com; used with permission)

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