Letter to the Editor: I Was in a Dark and Dangerous Spiritual Deception

Dear Lighthouse Trails:

Thank you for your article on testing the spirits. I have neglected to test the spirits. Here is a short summary of what happened to me, which is actually a huge story coming out of lies into Truth in the past almost five years.

In short: I used to be a Clinical Psychologist. I had a humanistic view and understanding of life, quite liberal and “politically correct” with that “good person” kind of idea. I also went into New Age, eastern ideas, esoteric, although I grew up in a traditional Protestant church. I always had a need for more knowledge, about what is going on in the world and also my own life. I was quite a conscientious child and person, and I remember people (some family or friends/others) would remark to me that I am too uptight and need to lighten up a bit).

Sporadically at some point in my 20s, I started “relaxing” more and “lightening up” more. I started to feel confused by people who called themselves Christians, and I think my decision to study psychology (which pushes liberated thinking) to find answers, coupled with this confusion of Christianity and my lack of Biblical knowledge, contributed to me looking for more answers outside, in the places God forbids.

The liberating thing that happens in psychology training also seemed to confirm this message I felt I was getting to let go more and become more open-minded and liberated. I started feeling quite good and empowered and freer in a way. And to me, it seemed that THAT was the current and trendy way. I thought I was progressive and forward thinking and in the truth. I thought the word “sin” was old fashioned. I had no idea! I also did not know that the Bible is full of warnings against deception. I did not know or grasp the Truth about the Gospel of Jesus. I was at a point that I also did not believe the devil existed.

I landed in the spiritual gutters, unbeknownst to myself. I was in a dark dingy ally in the spirit through my thinking. To my shock, I went to a place in my thinking in the spirit that I would never go in the physical world. This place in thinking is actually where many people are and what many books are written about and much in the world today is considered as normal and fine and “in.”

Then I got attacked by demons; I had no idea what it was or that it even existed. I saw and experienced a number of things that I now know was a spiritual battle. I saw demons operate through people (this looks like human behavior, but it is bizarre and totally void of reality and expecially empathy (to name a few) and also objects that move and things that happen through technology as in a paranormal way. I saw a demon too, and I also saw an angel for a moment, I saw a delivery. I saw the way they can come against people to destroy their lives. I realize how God protected me and my family against the full force of the attack. We have had a lot of trauma and losses, but I can see now why.

I have subsequently learned so much and gained so much about God’s Truth. It has been very hard at times though, yet we would have been destroyed if it was not for God’s help and mercy and His truth. Psychology and psychiatry would never have been able to give the answers and freedom that God’s Word has given regarding this attack and experience. Before I knew what was going on (which took a number of years) I did know I should stay away from psychology and psychiatry. I went looking for answers. I went past Reiki [energy healing] and Catholicism, then back to a traditional Protestant church, then into charismatic—at one charismatic ministry I learned for the first time that we were attacked by demons and that our struggle is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12). I knew psychology and psychiatry does not know this, and I left psychology or any future “career” in psychology. My husband and I thought we now needed to be in the charismatic environment as they seem to know the truth, as they or some of them understand there is something like demonic attacks, which no one else knows and that it can happen to people as it did to us.

However, in some of the charismatic environments, we heard so much confusion and compromise, pop-psych, New Age ideas, and no real caution against sin or repentance. I remember thinking I heard so many of the New Age things in the charismatic environment, I was very confused. I also did not understand how there were so many differences in the charismatic “churches” and their understanding and teachings. But because I had felt so bad for being so far away from God and the Truth and that I got attacked by demons, and seeing how all these people have been so “good” and in the truth all this time, I thought “what do I know”? Maybe I was so close to the truth in New Age I just needed to add or do it adding Scriptures from the Bible. I did often feel uncomfortable, but I thought “who was I, knowing where I was and what happened to me, to now feel uncomfortable”?

My husband and I read the Bible and listened to teachers we thought followed the Bible. Sporadically what we experienced in the charismatic environment did not match with what we learned from God’s Word, and also our experience and knowing how living outside biblical boundaries can open us for demonic attack did not seem to be something some charismatic people we met fully understood. We could see and hear how the things they say and do are actually not honoring or even understanding the message in the Bible (the narrow gate message-Matthew 7:13-14). Then about eight months ago, I learned about the NAR lies.

My husband (a former Catholic) and I read about the NAR, and we realized it has New Age and Catholic lies combined. Suddenly, so much more made sense! We almost went from the frying pan into the fire. By God’s grace and mercy, we have been saved again out of the charismatic NAR lies. We have since been in the Truth.

I have been quite alone with my story. I have been devastated at realizing how I fell for many many lies and how this is happening to many people and that with our struggle not being against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12) so many people do not realize what’s happening when things happen in their lives. They look for answers in places that where the ones who are offering the help are also often in half-truths or lies.

To me, it seems that those in the helping roles (professions or ministries) either humanize everything and do not know our struggle is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12), OR some understand Ephesians 6:12, yet they either operate outside of the Vine (John 15) under people who call themselves apostles, doing all the NAR things and/or battle the devil themselves and teach others to do so too, engaging in what they call spiritual warfare, which is against what God says we must do. “But even the archangel Michael, when he was disputing the devil about the body of Moses, did not himself dare to condemn him for slander but said, “The Lord rebuke you!” (Jude 1:9).

What I have learned is that our battle is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12); demons can and do attack people and their lives, which can seem like human choices or behavior and can land people up at psychiatrists and psychologists or pastors’ counseling offices; and our only protection and freedom or warfare is to come into submission under God, (James 4:7) into biblical boundaries, and to wear the armor of God (Ephesians 6).

What I have also learned is, walking in biblical boundaries also means understanding sins such as idolatry and the occult, and how this can be missed even by Christians who think it is okay to say something was “magical,” or that Yoga and Pilates are okay. I feel sad that many people are being led astray and are ill-prepared, if they even are being prepared at all for what to watch out for, by places called churches. People are shown wrong paths or follow wrong paths, and when things happen, they are offered help that is often not in the Truth.

The Bible warns us against attacks (1 Peter 5:8), that our struggle is not against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12), that there will be much deception, and that the “thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10. That “wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” Mathew 7: 13-14

M.B.

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(image from istockphoto.com; used with permission)