{"id":35995,"date":"2023-04-05T13:00:00","date_gmt":"2023-04-05T20:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\/blog\/?p=35995"},"modified":"2026-07-10T21:01:15","modified_gmt":"2026-07-11T04:01:15","slug":"update-from-kevin-reeves","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\/blog\/update-from-kevin-reeves\/","title":{"rendered":"Update From Kevin Reeves"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

LTRP Note: <\/strong>As many of you know, on March 12th, we issued a special notice<\/a> and request for our author and editor Kevin Reeves<\/a> who had just lost his wife. Below is a letter wrote today, and we thought many of you would like to read it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dear friends<\/strong>,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am now back in my home of Valdez, Alaska, struggling to learn how to live without my wife of thirty-eight years. By anyone’s standards, that is a long time to share dreams, disappointments, sadnesses, prosperity, poverty, and, most of all, love. In the apartment the two of us shared, she is all about me, her memory, anyway, and so many of the things she had arranged before we left for her cancer treatment–her winter boots by the entryway, the children’s books she was going to give to the local homeschool group, her bath towel hanging in the bathroom–all make it look as if she had just stepped out for a moment and would be right back. I haven’t the heart, or courage, to move them just yet, as if keeping them in the place she set them would hold off the winter reality of her not here.<\/p>\n\n\n

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\"\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

It’s hard to write through tears, but my thoughts won’t come without them, and anyway, I haven’t found the shut-off valve yet, or if one even exists. The wise ones, the ones who have been living it for a long time, don’t tell you ahead of time about the grief that comes from losing a spouse because there simply are no words to prepare you for it. In my nearly four decades in Alaska, I’ve lived through many earthquakes and lots of times had to run for high ground when warned of a possible tsunami. I never did see one, but I feel now that I’ve experienced a recent tsunami nonetheless, a wild, incoming tide of emotion that sweeps over any protective seawall I thought would shelter my heart. The tide will be coming in for a long time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I found a poem in my wallet that I had begun to write to Kris some years ago, and never finished. Now, I don’t know what to do with it. I can’t throw it away because that would force me to admit she will never read it. But keeping it would anchor me to a past of poems written to the only woman who had ever captured my whole heart. For now, it stays in the wallet, awaiting a decision that perhaps will never come.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I ask all those who contributed to this fund, and who have in other ways shown their caring for Kris and me, to please forgive the depths of sadness of this post. At only a little more than three weeks into the death of my beloved wife, I am still in what they call “The Fog” of grief, where I’m wandering about with my hands stretched out before me, hoping to touch something that will make sense of it all.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

It’s not all darkness and clouds. I have taken great comfort from the Scriptures and the presence of my Jesus. “Though I sit in darkness, the LORD shall be a light unto me.” So, right now, I do the only thing I know to do\u2014put one foot in front of the other and slog forward on this road of tears, this grief walk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

All who have contributed to us in this painful journey, whether by money, prayers, cards, kind words, with all my heart I thank you. You have been a blessing in a way that neither you nor I can fully understand right now, but one day will. Thank you. Thank you. Kevin<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

LTRP Note: As many of…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":46,"featured_media":36000,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[122],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-35995","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-a-global-spirituality","wpcat-122-id"],"yoast_head":"\nUpdate From Kevin Reeves - From the Lighthouse<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\/blog\/update-from-kevin-reeves\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Update From Kevin Reeves\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"LTRP Note: As many of...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\/blog\/update-from-kevin-reeves\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"From the Lighthouse\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/LighthouseTrailsResearch\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-04-05T20:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-07-11T04:01:15+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/kevin-kris.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"800\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Kevin Reeves\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@LTrails\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@LTrails\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Kevin Reeves\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Kevin Reeves\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/0da96b3647d56a1490cd321a596ee9e9\"},\"headline\":\"Update From Kevin Reeves\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-04-05T20:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-07-11T04:01:15+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":620,\"commentCount\":5,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2023\\\/04\\\/kevin-kris.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"A GLOBAL SPIRITUALITY\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com\\\/blog\\\/update-from-kevin-reeves\\\/\",\"name\":\"Update From Kevin Reeves - 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